lunabee34

1. I have been in a pissy mood since my neurology appointment. I got my hopes up for a diagnosis, and I shouldn't have. To be fair, the neuro did say I have all the symptoms of MS except brain lesions, and I could just be lucky enough that none of my episodes have scarred my brain yet. He wants to continue to monitor me. I am still getting the eye CT exam, and that might yield something; he said if it did show evidence of optic neuritis, he'd be comfortable diagnosing me with MS. But I suspect that it won't reveal anything because no tests ever do. So I've been playing the whole is it all in my head? am I just imagining these symptoms? or am I lazy and looking for a justification? or attention seeking? or too fat? or crazy? game. But in the end, it doesn't matter. I've got to live with what's going on regardless of its origin, and I'm on my own with dealing with it.

So I'm doing the whole angry-mourning thing, and once I go to the eye doc, I'm just putting it to bed. No more seeking a diagnosis without the emergence of new or more intense symptoms. I'm really tired of digging a hole, throwing money into it, and setting it on fire. It is time for Project Acceptance and Endurance to begin.

2. Shot #2 kicked our asses on Saturday. Twelve hours after the shot my arm hurt so badly that it is the worst physical pain I've had outside childbirth. Which is, ah, saying something. Fortunately, the pain responded to tylenol which kicked it back to a manageable level. Both of us had fevers, body aches, and general tiredness on Sunday; I also had a terrible headache. Today, I'm still tired but pretty much fine. I'm still having the heightened neuropathy in my leg that started after the shot, and my arm still hurts a little (I've got a big, hot rash over the injection site), but I'm mostly fine. Josh is mostly fine now, too, but it took him a little longer to get that way than I did.

3. In other random news, I forgot to post about when I had the MRI. I found it strangely soothing and trancelike. It did not sound at all like the MRIs I remember from 25 years ago. Instead of a hammer beating on a metal drum, it sounded more like music to me; there were definitely tonal shifts and varying rhythms. It was oddly hypnotic. If I hadn't been worried about being completely still, I think I would have fallen asleep.

3. Have some awesome stuff to look at.

Thanks to amejisuto, I now know that Star Trek perfumes exist. I don't even know what to say about these, y'all. I mean Red Shirt? Pon Farr? Somebody did not think through the marketing strategy. *dies laughing*

Cuckoo Clocks by executrix
Blake's 7
Blake/Gan
This is full of all the hallmarks of executrix's writing: humor, spot-on dialogue, dangerous wit; it's extremely funny in places, and then it's very much not. Highly recommended.